I'm currently a yellow belt but I'm sparring with brown, red and black belts. Of course I'm not as good as they are so during sparring I get emotional and frustrated very quickly... I know it's silly and I try to compose myself but I was wondering if there is an excersise Or some kind of meditation I can try out? or do I just have to be patience to get to the "Mushin" stage?
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First of all, ask yourself this - why are you getting frustrated? Is it because you're getting your ass handed to you? Or is it because you find yourself almost getting something, but not quite? If it's because you're getting your ass handed to you...well, that's what you get for sparring with the black belts. :P But seriously, though, even if they're holding back and sparring with you at your level, they're probably still doing things subconsciously that you don't know how to do or counter at all, or at the very least, they know the cues better than you and will react accordingly. If you don't want them to do this, find someone closer to your training level to spar with. If you're finding yourself "beating yourself" (that is, it's your own mistakes that are getting you into those positions, and not an experience difference or lack of knowledge), then make a resolution to do something different next time. You can also ask the person you're sparring with if they see things you can improve or comment on your cues or patterns. One thing I've found is that the martial arts are a lot like chess - you have to think three moves ahead, and until you can do that, it's frustrating as hell, because if your opponent is more experienced then you, they'll see a lot more than you. When you find yourself getting frustrated, take a step back and take a few deep breaths. Force yourself to relax by concentrating on your breathing. Then talk either to yourself or with your sparring partner about what you could have done better/differently. Ultimately, it's the only way to learn. Meditation will, of course, help you take longer to get to that frustration point, but it's a long-term solution, not a short-term one. That said, there are a number of different kinds of meditation. Yoga and Tai Chi are both meditative, but in different ways. You might want to start with them, if you can find a class that does them with a focus on meditation. You can also do visualizations, guided meditation, or just sit in silence. What one works best for you is ultimately going to be up to you, though, so in that case, Google will be your friend. Finally, as Morpheus put it "stop trying to hit me and hit me!" In other words - stop thinking so damn hard about it. If you've trained enough, you have the muscle memory and the subconscious knowledge to do what you need to do, so stop thinking about the moves and trying to do them, and just do them. Relax, even while you're sparring. |
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As a yellow belt, you have to realize you are just beginning. The most dangerous time in a student's career is when they are between the yellow and green belt level. It's because they know more than most of their friends, and might even be able to win a fight or two. Part of your training is to learn how to deal with defeat and not let it defeat you. Another big part that will be with you always, is actively thinking about what you are going to do next. Your at a place where you can't help but think about the next move, and that's OK. The things to focus on at this stage are:
The awareness, timing, and control are all fundamental aspects of martial arts. Control can be worked on every time you do your forms, or practice combinations in the air or on a target. However, the awareness and timing are only developed when you have an opponent. When you realize this, pay attention. Don't think of winning or losing, focus on the list I gave you. If you win against a brown belt it's probably because they dumbed down what they were doing too much and you got lucky. If you go into it with that attitude, it will help you keep your emotions in check. |
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Whenever I've sparred with the advanced belts, I always come away with the opinion of "I could have WON if I had thrown that punch an instant sooner, or turned the other direction when that kick was coming in". This means that the blackbelt (and/or the Master) was sparring me at my level. I learned tons this way. Getting my behind kicked would have taught me nothing other than how to take a beating. If you are getting frustrated because you keep getting close to connecting with punches/kicks, relax and let it happen, you will get some shots in sooner or later. If you are getting frustrated because you are in a no-win situation, then you need to figure out what's wrong. First ask one of the advanced belts you are sparring with after class why you can't seem to get ahead for all your trying. Maybe you do the same 3 moves in order over and over again, and they know what you are getting ready to do, and are prepared for it (then you need to mix up your sparring style, or plan that they know those moves are going to come in; since I stand backwards in fighting position, I became known to throw a round kick first thing. The guy I sparred with would start by taking a step back. I learned to then throw a back kick). If they are unhelpful, ask the class instructor if they can help you figure out why you are doing so poorly. S/He will either watch you and an advanced belt spar, or will spar with you and give you help directly. This should calm you down enough that your emotions are cooler to start with, after that, you need to learn to deal with emotions. For that, meditate. Figure out how your mind wants to be calmed down if you start to get hot in the middle of sparring. For me, I remember the face of the kid who almost got really hurt when I once lost control on the school yard, and it reminds me of the consequences of losing control. |
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Meditation is not going to help you in an immediate way with that problem. Your question is closely related to the previous question Harnessing emotion during sparring. What may help immediately is a boost to your self confidence. When sparring against higher grades it can be difficult to measure your progress over time, especially if they are also progressing. They are also trying to not be beaten by you - as higher ranks they should be faster, more co-ordinated, know more moves and be able to hit more openings than you can. So instead why don't you try sparring with someone of equal or lower rank? You don't want to beat the snot out of them, it is simply so you can measure your progress. Once you have got an accurate idea of where you are at you can take that knowledge and work on it, use it to improve yourself. This understanding may also give you a new and improved attitude when sparring higher ranks.
Turn that statement around and look at it this way: you get better by sparring them. So becoming frustrated or emotional is pointless, the sooner you recognise that then the sooner you can let it go.
It can take years to get to that stage. Patience is important (not having it may get you hurt), but that alone will not get you to the stage where you experience mushin. Part of achieving mushin is recognising incoming attacks and having the proficiency to deal with them1, and this is built up by sparring thousands of times against people better than yourself, which takes.... patience. In summary: people react in many different ways when attacked or in a stressful situation. This is one reason why we train so much - it helps overcome those natural responses. While there are various little techniques or practices you can apply to the problem there is no quick fix for it. Training and patience. 1This recognition and reaction is something that happens subconciously, so it isn't something you can force yourself to do. |
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I agree with what's been said so far, but I'd like to add my 2 cents. One thing to keep in mind is that part of martial arts training, and an essential part of sparring, is controlling your emotions. This is not something that people do automatically, or it wouldn't take training. Keep in mind that, not only are you training your body to move correctly, but you are also training your emotions and ki. It's a small adjustment to the way you perceive yourself, but it will make a big difference. Every time your emotions start to well up, look at it as an opportunity to train yourself to control them, rather than just trying to suppress them. And don't feel bad. This is something that we have ALL had to get our monkey brains wrapped around. You are not alone! :-) |
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Don't play their game. If they're not thinking of the sparring with you as an exercise, they're not learning anything, and neither are you. Talk to your instructor about it. |
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